A Letter to You Stepmom, on Mother’s Day

Mother’s Day, 2016stepmom

Dear Stepmom,

I know today is a day of mixed emotions for you. This is my first year as a “real mom” by society standards, but I remember too well the hollow aching you feel on this day. You work hard. You provide for children. You love children with all your heart. On this day, the children you love and care for are not there to hug you. Their labored crayon drawings and clay sculptures won’t be going to you today. Instead, you will find something else to keep your mind off this day and maybe, if your lucky, you will have the consolation that your husband will recognize your efforts.

I know this day can be hard. You’re job is a selfless one, at times…maybe even more than a “real” mom’s selflessness. You may wait in hopes of a call of remembrance and thanks, but this day can be lonely.

It seems on this day we remember those who are moms, those who were moms, and those who so desperately want to be moms. But, like many times, you are still in the wings. Today I remember you.

You are the stepmom. You ARE a hero!

Today hold your head high. You help raise children you didn’t bring into this world, but you love them! That deserves all this day can offer you. But you’re selfless again and let “mom” take the glory, showing again your selflessness and grace.

Well today know that you are a Victory Mom and that this fellow mom salutes you! It dosn’t change the dull ache in your lonely heart today, but know that you are not alone, your stepchildren love you, and you are worth more than this Hallmark holiday could provide.

You’re a mom above the rest! You’re a Victory Mom!

Happy Mother’s Day to you! You truly deserve it!



PS. Yes, I did hear that they followed up with a Stepmom Day. After some research, I even see it’s the Sunday after Mother’s Day (how sweet, we can follow behind her again). But let’s get real… Hallmark isn’t lining the stores with cards and advertisements. The restaurants are filled with happy stepmoms and their step-kids. Without Google, I didn’t even know this day existed AND I’m a “stepmom.” It’s not the same and doesn’t fill your loneliness the Sunday before when mother’s are being honored and you’re reminded of all the work you do for children who once again, you’re reminded “aren’t yours.” But don’t worry Victory moms, I got your back… and you have a place in my heart. We will get through this day with our heads held high like we always do… and we won’t stop loving those little critters (or berries) in our blended family!

2 Responses

  1. Dawn

    That made me cry! I guess I never thought about it much as I’ve never been a step mom, but Gavin actually does have a step mom. Next year I will make sure to have him acknowledge her on mothers day as well,thank you for the eye opener!

    1. I’m happy to hear it impacted you! It used to be a holiday of dread for me. I think if Gavin’s stepmom is invested in him, a gesture from him (which she will know came from you), will be very touching and go a long way!

Leave a Reply